Divorce Mediation is a process in which divorcing spouses sit down with a neutral third party to resolve the issues in their divorce. This can be a great option for some couples. Even if you (or your spouse) don’t feel ready to mediate, when you consider the financial and emotional costs of a contested divorce, you might want to give mediation a try.
But before you do, consider your relationship with your spouse. You are most likely to have a successful mediation experience if all or most of the following statements are true.
The Decision to Divorce Is Mutual
Sometimes, the decision to divorce is mutual. Both spouses come to the conclusion, more or less at the same time, that the marriage is over. For other couples, the decision is more one-sided. One spouse decides that a divorce is necessary, while the other spouse is unprepared for, and perhaps opposed to, the idea of getting divorced.
When the decision to divorce is mutual, spouses usually find it easier to begin working together on a settlement in mediation than they would if one spouse initiates the divorce. Where one spouse makes the decision, it is natural for the other to resist cooperating with any requests to move along in the process, including a request to mediate. This usually changes with the passage of time, so factor timing into your assessment of your readiness. If the divorce was more one person’s decision than the other’s, more time may be needed before you begin mediating.
Acceptance of the idea of Separation/Divorce
If you and your spouse have accepted (however reluctantly) the reality of your separation being permanent, and if neither one of you has an overwhelming desire to reconcile, then the odds are that each of you has reached the emotional point in divorce when mediation can be productive.
This doesn’t mean you must rule out the possibility of reconciliation. But you do have to be ready to focus on what happens if you and your spouse don’t get back together.
Good Parenting Skills
Mediation is usually considered one of the best ways for divorcing parents to negotiate agreements about their children. You can talk, parent to parent, about what is best for your children, rather than leaving the decisions up to strangers. Differences in parenting styles or the amount of time each of you spends with your children can be addressed in mediation.
If the above matches both you and your spouse, or if you’d like to further discuss Divorce Mediation, please contact us at Beringer Law. We’ll provide you with legal expert advice and guide you through the best process for you and the family.